Create Something with Your Hands, and other Tips for Reducing Stress

This has been a busy and stressful week.  I've felt like I'm getting sick for the past few days, have worked long days and late nights, haven't seen my daughter much at all, and still, yes, still, have boxes left to unpack from when we moved in.  When laundry piles up, and dishes go unwashed, and I have tight deadlines looming...it seems like my best attempts to be the gladdest thing, and look at the glass as half full, and appreciate what I have--just don't cut it.

So, what do I do on weeks like this?

Here are the five things I've noticed myself doing to reduce my stress level (and I think they're pretty consistently things that I turn to when I need a happiness boost, as well.):

1.   I create something with my hands.  - I love to create things. I love crafts.  I like to build things out of whatever I can find.  I like to hang pictures on a wall or paint a shelf or wrap a present well.  This week, on one of my busiest days, when I felt like I was furthest away from "living my priorities," Flanna and I went outside for a few minutes, took a piece of bamboo that had fallen during a storm, and created a teepee.  Nothing fancy.  Just bamboo and some string.  But using a saw and some ribbon to turn one long piece of bamboo into something new and fun for Flannery was really rewarding and quite a mood lifter.

2.  I listen to music I love. - Not new music, but music I've heard over and over for many years.  For me, there is great comfort in knowing every word and note to a song, and listening to it on repeat, even!

3.  I clear a surface. - Just cleaning off one table, or one shelf, or one area in my living rom can really help me feel calmer and less anxious.  I'm messy by nature, so it seems counterintuitive that clearing a surface could bring me such peace, but somehow, it does.

4.  I eat chocolate.  - Dark chocolate is best.   And not too much.  Just one or two bites will do.  Any more than that, actually, and it cancels out the mood boost, for me.  Overindulging just makes me feel yucky about myself, so I really do stick to a tiny bit.  (I'm a moderator, so that works for me.  But if you're an "abstainer," this one may not work for you, I think.)

5. I read a book to my daughter. -  Some of the best times I've ever had as a mom have been sharing books with my daughter and niece.  Tonight, I read "Amelia Bedelia goes Camping," with them, and I have to say, it was probably the best part of my day.  Super fun and super silly.  Plus, such wonderful figurative language and vocabulary!

And now the crazy busy week is over, and I get to spend some quality time with my daughter and niece,  and I finally have a bit of time to attempt some more unpacking and organizing at home, and maybe even to clear another surface!  So things are getting better all the time.



What do you do when you're overly stressed, to help reduce your anxiety level?

Don't Base Your Happiness on Other People's Mood

I'm often guilty of feeling responsible for my family's overall happiness or mood. Which can be a good motivator at times. I mean, my family is often happier when I can be lighthearted and silly with them, when I plan fun things into our week, and when I make a point to try to take time for myself so that I can be energetic and not drained when we're together. So, feeling responsible for the overall mood of my family can sometimes inspire me to take good actions.

But sometimes, regardless of how lighthearted and silly I am, or whether we've had fun times together, my daughter's mood can be a little sour. She's a kid, for goodness sake. She can't always be in a cheerful mood. As Flannery O'Conner says, "Kids have the weight of the world on their shoulders." Really, it's tough to do what people say all the time, and to have to follow what seem like arbitrary rules, and to have to eat stuff you don't like just because mom says, and to have to share your toys all the time.

Sometimes I need to remind myself that my child's mood should not dictate my own. She has no responsibility to be happy so I'll be happy. And it's unfair to expect anyone to be happy or cheerful all the time. We all have negative emotions, and it takes a long time to learn how to deal with those emotions. It's funny, it seems so natural to separate ourselves from a colleague, a family member, or a spouse who's had a bad day and is in a bad mood. We can chalk it up to stress or a tight deadline or something unrelated to ourselves. But when it's my daughter, I have a much harder time separating myself from her moods, from feeling responsible for them even. Which is just silly.

Anyway, I'm working on it. If you notice me all exasperated at Target with a grumpy kid in tow one day, remind me that I'm working on it!

I thought it was neat that I was able to capture a few of Flanna's different moods in these pictures of our museum trip yesterday. I especially love the deep thinking photo of her above!








Do you find yourself feeling responsible for your family members' moods? Or stressing over other things you can't really control?

7 Tips for Feeling Better About Yourself

Today was a stressful day. I still haven’t unpacked from my vacation. I have lots of deadlines coming up at work, which means tons of paperwork to get to. I had several calls to make and no child-free time to make them in. Then, I tried to make the calls, and ended up trying to sound professional with a screaming toddler in the background. Then, I spoke harshly to said screaming toddler. Then, my poor husband came home to a stressed mommy with no idea what to make for dinner. Then, I cried when he asked me how my day had been.

Not my best moment. Not my best day, actually.

But, in honor of bad days, I made a list of 7 ways to feel better. Hopefully, it will inspire me, too!


7 tips for Feeling Better about yourself:

1. Look at yourself through your own eyes. - Try not to think about how you look to others. Judge yourself by your own standards. You know what your priorities are; others don’t. For example, when my daughter was screaming today because she really wanted a sandwich right before dinner time, I was fine with letting her cry about it and not giving in. But then, I started worrying that the neighbors might hear her crying and think something was wrong. It made me a thousand times more stressed out to worry about what other people thought about the moment, rather than to just look at the situation from my own eyes and deal with it in the best way I knew how. If I can just focus on things through my own eyes, it really makes me feel better about myself.

2. Think of 3 things you’re grateful for right now. – not things that you once liked about yourself or things that you hope you will become. I stole this idea from my friend who writes the "Sharing the Journey" blog. Think of 3 things that you are thankful for about yourself right now, as you are. For example, I like how strong my body is today, I like that I am a fast report writer, & I like my crazy wavy red hair.

3. Remember a past accomplishment – Odds are, that accomplishment wasn’t easy. There were trials and hardships, but you pushed through and made it happen. Revel in that.

4. Call an old friend – Even if you just chat for 5 minutes, old friends are the best for helping you clear your fog and get back to yourself.

5. Do something small. - It’s satisfying to have a little success here and there. If the big things in your life are going a bit haywire, try finding some small successes. For me, that means I start a little project (scrapbooking, cooking, gardening, etc.) that will yield fast results.

6. Tidy up – Looking at chaos makes most of us feel stressed. Getting just one corner of a room in order and having something beautiful to look at can really boost my mood.

7. Listen to Your Body – Do you need more sleep? More protein? Maybe you haven’t been drinking enough water? Have you taken your vitamins? Sometimes when I’m feeling down, if I just get a nap or eat a snack, I feel a lot better.

By the way, this photo has absolutely nothing to do with this post....it just makes me feel better!


What makes you feel better about yourself? Any little tips that you have to share would be wonderful!